Clean jokes-Thinking fast

Mr. Smith was a traveling salesman and frequent flyer, so he was always very, VERY careful to mark his luggage so that no one would mistakenly take his bags.

He always did this with bright ribbons and tape, so he was quite surprised to see his bags grabbed by a well dressed man when he got to the luggage carousel.

Mr. Smith walked over to the fellow and pointed out the colored ribbons tied to the handle, and the fluorescent tape on the sides.

"I believe that luggage is mine. Were your bags marked like this?", he asked.

"Actually", the man replied, "I was wondering who did this to my luggage."

Really funny jokes-Headstone

After his wife died, the uncle of one of my friends decided to plan ahead and order a grave-site marker for himself. A week or so later, he came home to find a message on his answering machine. It was from a young woman at the company where he’d placed his order.

“I don’t know if it’s good news or bad,” she said, “but your headstone is ready.”

Doctor jokes-Wierd dreams

Sophie went to see a psychiatrist about her husband.

"Doctor, My husband has this problem. Almost every night now he's dreaming he's a refrigerator!"

"My dear, that is not really a problem! A lot of people dream that they are somebody or something unusual..."

Sophie leans forward as she softly whispers this confidence: "But you see doctor it is also a problem for me! Jake sleeps with his mouth open and the light keeps me awake!"

Hilarious jokes-AIDS Warning !

Senior citizens are the nation's leading carriers of AIDS!


HEARING AIDS


BAND AIDS


GARDENING AIDS


WALKING AIDS


MEDICAL AIDS


GOVERNMENT AIDS


MOST OF ALL,


MONETARY AID TO THEIR KIDS!


Not forgetting HIV (Hair is Vanishing)


And


AIDS : Acute income deficiency syndrome

Birthday party jokes-To be around

At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he planned to be around for his 104th.

"I certainly do," he replied. " Statistics show that very few people die between the ages of 103 and 104."

Really funny jokes-GPS override

Friend #1: Are you visiting us tomorrow? Do you need directions?

Friend #2: I'm all set. I have the address, a GPS, and a GPS override.

Friend #1: What's a GPS override?

Friend #2: My wife

Good jokes-Sports Team Names

Top 20 Rejected International Sports Team Names:

20. Islamabad Beggars

19. Brussels Sprouts

18. Cannes Openers

17. Amsterdam Yankees

16. Vienna Sausages

15. Belgium Waffles

14. Manila Folders

13. Czech Bouncers

12. New Delhi Catessans

11. Buenos Airheads

10. Guadalajara Krishnas

9. Iraqi Raccoons

8. Bolivia DeHavillands

7. Seoul Brothers

6. Taipei Personalities

5. Syria Killers

4. Hungary Jacks

3. Dublin Mint Twins

2. Prague Tologists

1. Peking Toms