Thứ Năm, 16 tháng 8, 2012

Short funny jokes-Horrible witch

Bobby to Johnny: My dad saw a scary ghost and didn't turn a hair!

Johnny: Doesn't surprise me - your dad's bald!

Thứ Ba, 14 tháng 8, 2012

Funny jokes-That's not it

A sergeant noticed that one of the privates was behaving oddly. The private would pick up any piece of paper he found, sulk and say, "That's not it" and put it down again.

This went on for some time, until the sergeant arranged to have the private psychologically tested.

The psychologist concluded that the private was mentally ill, and wrote out his discharge from the army.

The private picked it up, smiled and said: "That's it."

Office jokes-Get back on your feet

I went to a car dealership in my locality, and noticed they had found a creative way to warn customers who defaulted payments. Their sign said:

"The greatest way to get back on your feet - miss an installment payment."

Thứ Hai, 13 tháng 8, 2012

Really funny jokes-Signs

Signs that indicate you should start looking for a new lawyer:

# He tells you that his last good case was a Stroh's beer.
# When the prosecutors notice who your lawyer is, they hug each other.
# He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."
# He claims that he has never told a lie.
# A workplace has a sign saying "Don't ask me."
# You find a prison guard shaving your head.

Chủ Nhật, 12 tháng 8, 2012

Teacher jokes-Statue of Venus

Mrs. Katrina, the Arts teacher, addressed the class with a statue of Venus in her hands.
"What do you like best about this piece of art? Raise your hands."

Steven raised his hand and said, "The symmetry."

"Very good. And you, Justin?"

"Her assets!" says Justin

"Get out of the class, Justin and stand in the hall," responds Mrs. Katrina with loathing. "And you, Bubba?"

"I'm leaving, ma'am, I'm leaving..."

One line jokes-Opinion

When I want your suggestion, I will hammer it out of you.

Thứ Bảy, 11 tháng 8, 2012

Really funny jokes-A few wrinkles

Dara, now in her middle ages, had been considering coloring her hair. One day, while flipping through a fashion magazine, she saw an ad for a hair-coloring die featuring a pretty young model who was sporting a great hairstyle with a shade that Dara liked.

To get a second opinion, she asked her husband Jack, "How do you think this shade would look on a face with a few wrinkles?"

Jack took the magazine from her, crumpled the page with the ad, straightened it out and observed it again.

"Just great, darling."